Nigerian married men are battling depression and committing su!cide due to lack of spousal support - Psychiatrist, Dr. Adeoye Oyewole says
Dr. Adeoye Oyewole, a psychologist and psychiatrist at Ladoke Akintola University of Technology (LAUTECH), has expressed concerns about the mental health struggles of married men in Nigeria, attributing some of these challenges to a lack of support from their spouses. Speaking to ThePoint, Dr. Oyewole explained that many men are burdened with societal and family expectations, often left to handle financial responsibilities alone, leading to silent suffering and even passive suicidal tendencies. He noted that men’s mental health is further strained by a societal imbalance created by certain interpretations of feminism, which he says have marginalized men and placed undue pressures on them.
“Many men are depressed because their wives do not provide enough support in managing family responsibilities,” he said, adding that toxic feminism has also led to boys growing up without proper fatherly intervention, resulting in irresponsibility, substance abuse, and a lack of leadership skills. He emphasized that true feminism promotes harmony and partnership, rather than combativeness or hostility between genders.
Dr. Oyewole also highlighted the financial strain many men face, criticizing the cultural narrative that a man’s income belongs to the family, while a woman’s income is often kept private. “If a husband and wife earn similar salaries but the man is expected to handle everything, what happens to the woman’s income?” he questioned, pointing out that this dynamic contributes to men feeling immense financial and emotional pressure. He added that many men mask their depression through harmful coping mechanisms such as alcohol, which exacerbates health issues like hypertension, heart disease, and liver damage. “Men are under severe pressure,” he noted, “and even when they are struggling, they remain focused on their families’ well-being.”
Dr. Oyewole also addressed the rising trend of men being pressured to relocate their families abroad, leaving them feeling lonely and isolated in Nigeria. This, combined with mounting stress, has contributed to an increase in male depression and suicide rates. He emphasized that passive suicide neglecting health, ignoring medical advice, and refusing to rest is particularly alarming among men.
To address these issues, Dr. Oyewole advised men, especially those in mid-life, to prioritize their mental health and consider therapy. He also called on wives to support their husbands, help them manage stress, and ensure they take care of their physical and mental well-being. “Men need to find time for themselves, and their wives can play a significant role in providing support and reducing stress,” he concluded.